he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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