Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
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