I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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