her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
