I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
