just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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