After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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