I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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