Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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