You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
