I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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