where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
