Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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