look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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