My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
