I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Nobody cheats on THIS.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
