Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
