Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
