Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
