i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
