I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
