She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
