Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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