I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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