i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize