Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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