Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
