is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
