if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize