im about as happy as oj after his trial
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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