Don't you send me to vm
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
This toilet bowl is my home.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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