I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize