I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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