singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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