How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Randomize
