The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
