Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

what if I'm pregnant?

(848): View more from New Jersey

smusmorshion

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(908): View more from New Jersey

My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.

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(509): View more from Washington

im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid

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(256): View more from Alabama

made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold

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(760): View more from California

i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now

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(818): View more from California

Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.

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(513): View more from Ohio

Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.

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