brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize