The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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