Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize