thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
