i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
