Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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