Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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