its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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