I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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