His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
