did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
