in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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