my vag is so smooth its legendary
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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