Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I love having hate sex.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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